What’s up?
Let’s call this the relationship open thread, shall we?
I often quote Expecting Words blog’s Laurie Puhn because she is a relationship expert. She has a couple of books under her belt and a Facebook page that has some moms talking. Most recently, Puhn published these two updates, which created a healthy response:
Couples often have phases in their relationships, good years, and then not-so perfect years and back to more good years. If your relationship is going through a rough spell, don’t give up! Has anyone experienced the phases and survived?
Game Show time! Name “Things that Make a Couple More Likely to Fight“ 1) Broken air conditioning (I’m suffering from that right now!), 2) Lack of sleep, 3) A new baby, 4) ….. what’s your answer?
On the latter, money was a big issue that caused even temporary separations. But a couple moms did comment on kids — including their husbands acting like children — and sleep deprivation.
In the beginning of my and DH’s relationship — that would be 14 years ago! — we did have spats over money, but not enough to break us up. One of us would fret about our debt load, then we’d fight over who was spending what, and we’d end up spending more money making up over takeout. (Ay!) In recent years, however, I would say that sleep deprivation and division of labor — meaning childcare — has caused the most tension in our relationship. But we have managed to plunge through, meaning, we have fought, but then made up and talked things over after we’ve had time to stew. What about you? What are some of the things you and your partner fight about? How do you “roll with the punches” so to speak?
In dysfunctional relationship news, Time magazine covered a study showing that people who have recently experienced a breakup exhibit the same symptoms of addiction as someone on cocaine. Read on:
It also helps explain why feelings of heartbreak are so hard to get over and even harder to control. The study notes, with classic academic rigor, that the spurned students had engaged in activities such as “inappropriate phoning, writing or e-mailing, pleading for reconciliation, sobbing for hours, drinking too much and/or making dramatic entrances and exits into the rejecter’s home, place of work or social space to express anger, despair or passionate love.” Sound familiar, anyone?
At least in one sense, this pain is a good thing, according to Brown. “In a way, nature gave us this response as a protection,” she says. “It helps us keep relationships going under adverse circumstances, which is important for keeping our species going.”
Such pain is also the first step in helping people get over their exes.
What else is in the news? What’s up with you?
